I have sent over 40 job applications and I check all the possible websites almost every single day. However, it seems so hopeless and feels damned frustrating to get no results whatsoever. I guess you really do nothing with high school education, since nothing is what I've got. I am just not used to failing like this, I have always been so hard-working and done my best in everything to succeed and to achieve goals with my efforts. I have always had it so planned out, and now I have no freaking idea when and if something will happen.
Yeah, yeah, I am doing my best staying positive but in case you've never been in my situation, you can't imagine what it feels like. I am ready to move out, start my independent life but no, I am stuck here. Don't get me wrong, I like having free time and watching three movies a day (oops.. even I admit that is kind of waste of time), but it is really hard to enjoy the freedom when you can't shake off the haunting feeling of uncertainty and fear. What if my life will stay the same for months more?
There is one option I could spend my time with in case I don't find a job soon, which is called job experiment or something like that. The point of it is that you find a workplace that will take you there for a month or so and the social insurance institution of Finland pays you about half of the monthly salary. It is a way to support unemployed youngsters and to help them with their future career plans. That would be okay for me too, a little money is better than no money since I don't get any money from anywhere, but the only problem is that since we live in the countryside, I'd have to find a place in the city where my father works and that would take me for the same hours as my dad's so I could get a ride with him. Otherwise I might as well stay at home since the travel costs would eat my pay almost entirely.
So, all in all my life is kind of on pause, nothing's moving forward and since the burning injury I can't even do any sports yet. I can't wait to heal, I want to start working out 'cause I haven't done anything since the beginning of the summer. My only hope right now is to get some action and please, somebody give me a job.
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