Tranquility

Somehow I'm still trying to get to that point of realization that I'm really on vacation. It's always been a huge deal, everyone's made a big fuss about the beginning of the summer vacation but this year it just sort of happened without noticing. And it's a long vacation, I won't have to get back to the normal routines until the beginning of September. However, I won't have much time to slack this summer, as I'll be running from camp to camp and trying to do some studying in between as well. It's all sort of absurd, it's like I have all the time in the world to relax and do nice stuff but still I'll be busy as ever.

I also feel a bit empty. I feel like I have reached the end of an era by finishing the freshmen year, so much has happened. Things started, things ended. People came, people left. I found my place, but I'm constantly learning and I am both excited and a little afraid to see what the future holds. I've got a clean slate now, once again.

Walking along the almost too familiar road at home in the countryside yesterday I felt different. I felt that, for the first time, I'm just passing by. I'm not tied here anymore the way I've been so far, I'm not going to be stuck here all summer. I have things to do, places to go, I have the world to explore. The realization made me appreciate it all a lot more; my childhood, my upbringing in the countryside in a steady environment and among a loving family. Moreover, I felt calm. Yes, I have tons of exciting, new things to try but I am not in a hurry. I have a busy summer ahead, but for now I can just lift my face up to the sunshine, close my eyes, listen to the distant cuckoo of the birds and smile. I am home.