I have had more piece of mind after my conversation with my friend a while back, thank you for helping me by understanding my confusion about being so clueless and messed up! Can't say I've figured it out but maybe I'm not quite as confused anymore. Anyway, another feeling has emerged from the back of my head and it is one of the scariest feelings I know. Time is running out.
Having one exam and one feedback lesson left of school this spring, it is starting to really sink in that this is it, maybe for good for me in this school and this city. I know it is completely my decision when it comes to what I am doing and where I am going, but somehow I feel like time's up here and I am changing the direction of my life again, mostly willingly but a little part of me wonders if I really wanna leave this place. I don't know if I'm finished here yet.
I am looking forward to the new breezes school-wise, but my social life here is really what I will remember of these few months of my life. I have made so many friends and even the thought of leaving them and this part of my life terrifies me. I am so ready to find what I am good at and passionate about, but what am I supposed to do when I am finally passionately living my life and it finally got interesting? I get the now or never-feeling quite a lot now but in the end I always end up pushing that thought away because the never-option makes me actually a little sad.
To finish this I want to share a song that gives you the feeling only a student knows. Though the education gained in this school hasn't been really my thing, it has been probably the best time of my life so far, even with all the confusion and steps taken backwards. Figuratively and literally, I gotta add... And notice Haaga-Helia coveralls, nobody's got them as cool as we do! I have been proud to wear them through so many weird and amazing moments.
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